mood vampire.

The last couple years I have realized something about myself – I am a mood vampire. I feed off other people’s energy. This is especially true for me in a work environment.  If people are excited, energized and collaborative – I am too.  I soak up their positive vibes and thrive on it. This is when I’m most productive and creative; this is when I ROCK.  If I’m hanging out with Debby-Downer , Connie-the-Complainer or The-Grass-is-Always-Greener-Gail, it’s very easy for me to be pulled down. Sucked in. I, too, start complaining and my outlook becomes a little gloomy. Now don’t go confusing this with venting. Everyone needs to be able to vent and to release some steam. I don’t mind venting; in fact I usually welcome it. I’m talking about doom and gloom. Bad attitudes. And laziness.  For better or for worse, I’m a sponge. I absorb all of it – good and bad.

I think this is part of the reason why I thrive in a collaborative, team-environment. A place where teamwork is valued and where “we are all in this together”. I love celebrating together – and rising to the occasion when it’s needed. Solving problems. Reliving our victories and commiserating over our defeats.  The energy is practically addicting. I think I would be unhappy in a job where I was flying solo all the time.

I’m not really sure where I’m going with all of this, except that I guess I need to be careful when the mood turns gloomy – so I don’t soak up too much!

all nerves

Tomorrow I start my new job and I’m SO excited and nervous! I wasn’t nearly this nervous for my last job, but I think it’s because I knew what to expect – it was the same job, just a different advertising agency. This is a new industry and a very different role. I feel like it’s the first day of kindergarten – I know it’s going to be awesome – but I’m not exactly sure what to expect.

I hope I can sleep tonight. Wish me luck!

good-bye advertising

I am happy to announce that I will be starting a new and exciting job in June! In my effort not to talk about work on my blog, I won’t name the company, but I will share a few details.  The position is a complete departure from what I’ve been doing (advertising) and is focused on product management. I will be a Product Development Manager and will manage 25-30 products for a company in the travel industry.

I am VERY excited about this new role and about the change in industry. Advertising has felt meaningless to me for awhile now, and I’ve been struggling with how to change-it-up. Those of you who have worked in ad agencies before know the drill. The people are great and the culture is fun….BUT it’s really hard work – with a high burnout rate. You live and die by your clients (even if they are wrong) and you are in a constant state of feast or famine. Either you have too much work to do or the agency doesn’t have enough work and you are throwing yourself at every RFP that comes your way. I’ve been doing it for 4 years now, and I’m ready for a change.

I know the new gig won’t be perfect and it certainly won’t be easy. But I’m ready for a new challenge. Did I mention I’ll have an office on the 26^th floor?!?! I’M SO EXCITED!

When I grow up

I’m going to be a doctor. An Olympic swimmer. A professional skateboarder. There are people out there who were born knowing their passion and their future occupation. I’m not one of those people. I envy those people. It’s such a blessing to be born with a unique skill and a strong passion that shapes your life. What do I have? I’m good at a lot of things, but I’m not exceptional at any one thing. I’m well-rounded. Where does that leave me?

As I move through my 20s, I’m struggling with what I want to “do” with my life. Unfortunately, I’m extremely fragmented. I want to be a writer. I want to start my own business. I want go back to school. I have so many ideas and see so many opportunities. But I never act on them, or if I do I only “half” act on them. I never dive in head first; instead I approach the pool and test the cold water and then pull out. The responsible and cautious side of me always wins.

Part of my problem is that I don’t entirely trust myself. My ideas and excitement levels fluctuate so much that it’s hard to decipher a crazy idea from an idea I truly believe in. I feel like I should “just know” when I have a THE plan. The clouds will part and I will suddenly have clear direction. But that hasn’t happened yet. Does that mean I haven’t had a winning idea yet?

I want my work to be meaningful and fulfilling. I don’t want to be one of those 60 year olds who are saying, “I’m 60 and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.” Although I can certainly relate, I find it kind of pathetic. Are they in that position because they never took a risk? Because they never found their passion? Or is it because some people are constantly changing and are never content where they are at?

Clearly I don’t have the answer. For all you firefighters out there that have known your life’s calling from day-one, consider yourself lucky. I hope I figure out mine someday. I would prefer sooner than later.